Dear Mysterious Entry,

Last week I was filing through all of the numbers in my cell phone address list when I came across an unusual name, one which I do not remember entering data for. Who are you Ms. Katrina Felger? Your sensuous name sounds as if it should evoke in me a tumble of memories. Rrraaeerrrr...But I have not one recollection of the interaction that led to my having your phone number. Perhaps you were that flirty middle aged woman (I don't know anyone my age named Karina), who sat on the bench next to me at the post office, number 53 in line behind my 48 I believe it was. No my mom does not still tuck me in at night! Did you put your name in my abandoned cell phone while I was paying for my overnight package? Shame on you. Sly, but shame on you. Or was it you, the cross dressing gregarious creature that you were at the airport. When I asked you to please watch my things while I go to the newsstand for a magazine, I didn't mean help yourself to the contents of my backpack. I usually give people the benefit of the doubt. But I will have to think twice, or thrice maybe, before I let another sexually confused person keep an eye on my personal belongings.

As I said I was filing through the names last week, looking for someone to go to the movies with, not necessarily a date, just good company. I thought about giving you a call, just to find out who you really were. I dialed and let it ring once, twice...You picked up before the third ring. Karina, you must have had a cold, because you sounded like my Dad when he's got something caught in his throat at the dinner table. I'm sorry I didn't say anything back to you. I guess I really didn't want to talk to you that much in the first place. I was just wanted to see if you'd actually pick up. So anyways, congratulations because as a result this new SIMS card technology your name will always come up, probably for the rest of my life, right next to my old pastor's name, Paul Fowler.

You're sick. You know that?

Ryan Vaughn
Austin, TX